The Way Things Are
by Mekou
Summary: Accepting the way things are is harder than it sounds. A story about sex, drugs, love, and near death. Noodle and 2D, Murdoc x 2D. Nov 2010 - Currently being revised. Chapters will be re-added as they are fixed!
1. Chapter 1: Stars

**Chapter 1: Stars**

**

* * *

**

**Author's Note:**

This was a story that I wrote in November 2005 when I first got into Gorillaz. Getting back into the fandom has inspired me to do all the editing that I was un-motivated to do five years ago. Other than a few sentences here and there, I am not planning on adding anything new to the story.

This is a 2D x Murdoc fic, but there is a bit of stuff going on between 2D and Noodle.

* * *

Noodle's voice was barely a whisper. "2D?" she asked, poking him in side to test if he was still awake.

"Yeah?" he responded, the word barely existing through a deep yawn. He and Noodle had been sitting on the roof of Kong Studios for several hours now, both of them feeling sleep creeping up. They hadn't been doing anything that interesting, just talking about anything that came to mind, and staring at the stars.

She spoke softly, drawing her knees up closer to her chest. "Do you ever look up at the stars and wonder; How many of them are we really looking at?"

2D was in the process of lighting another of several cigarettes that night. This one was to try and keep himself conscious for a little while longer. He inhaled sharply and let out a soft breath before he replied. "What, you mean like...counting them?" he said in a serious tone.

"No," Noodle laughed. "How many of them still exist? A hundred stars could die right now, but we wouldn't notice it for thousands of years."

"Maybe we should give them our number so they can call and let us know," came the reply. He was joking that time, and he turned his head to grin widely at her as she giggled. He found her to be quite adorable when she laughed. Her hands would draw up to her face as though to hide her grin.

They had been going to the roof almost every night for the past month, and the nightly ritual had caused them to grow even closer than they were before. They told each other their secrets, their feelings. And, especially from 2D, random thoughts that really made no sense but had to be said anyway.

In that time, she had to admit, Noodle had developed a little crush on her band-mate. It was what made her do all this. Even when she was exhausted from a long day of recording, interviews, or other busy work, she would still meet him on the roof and stay with him for hours.

She never considered herself shy or reserved. Noodle was always very outgoing with her feelings, but this was one of the few situations that made her tongue feel like it was tied to the roof of her mouth. Her hesitance on confessing her emotions had nothing to do with the age difference. She was a firm believer that love is blind and that one should not push aside feelings of love due to gender, race or age. However...

"Speaking of calling, have you spoken with Murdoc yet?"

"No, not yet."

2D had confessed to her, the previous night in fact, that he fancied Murdoc. Murdoc! He had also confessed that he was terrified of those feelings. Not because they were for their unruly bassist (Even though it was something one _should_ be afraid of.), but because it was for another man.

A secret that confessed to her, the previous night in fact, was that years and years ago he'd been sexually assaulted by a school chum of his. The details weren't spoken, but he told her a vague story of being pushed against a brick wall and having another man's tongue and hands all over him. He'd thought he was long past those ugly memories by now. Noodle pointed out the reasons to prove otherwise.

"Are you going to?"

"Do I have to?"

"I think you need to."

Secretly, he was afraid of any kind of relationship, possibly as a result of that experience. The incident with Paula had left him feeling used and unloved, and Murdoc's constant abuse and bragging about the many women he took to bed every night didn't help. 2D didn't understand why he had feelings for the that man. The singer often joked to himself that he must be a secret masochist or something.

All joking aside, he couldn't figure out the reason why. The feelings were just there, and a voice in his head was telling him to act on them. Even though he was afraid.

Noodle was glad to be trusted enough to know this secret, but it hurt her a little inside. She decided that it was best not to tell 2D about her own feelings. She'd rather help him find the courage to confront Murdoc with his. All she wanted was to see her friend happy. And, as ironic as it sounded, being around Murdoc did make him happy.

"You have to tell him," Noodle asserted.

2D exhaled a large cloud of smoke between the gap in his teeth. "It's not that easy," he replied. "I've been waiting to catch him in a good mood, but he's been sour for days."

"Do you think he likes you back?" It was a question she would rather not know the answer to, to be honest, but had to be asked. For her own sake.

"A while ago he was making passes at me. Giving me suggestive looks and stuff. I swear I wasn't imaging it either. It's the same look he gives to girls he fancies.

" 2D took one last puff of his cigarette and then mashed the remains into the floor next to him. The ground had become quite littered with them during the past month. "I dunno. Maybe he was just drunk, or high, or something. Does he ever say anything about me when I'm not around? That's not insults and stuff?"

Noodle's mouth suddenly refused to work. She thought about the time Murdoc had complimented 2D's rear. Russel just assumed he was drunk, which he was, but even that sort of comment was unusual for him. She recalled when Murdoc explained that being drunk doesn't make you that much different. If you like someone or not, you'll have the same feelings drunk or sober.

"No," she said quickly.

There were many other times where she had seen her demonic band-mate gazing at a magazine spread of their lead singer with a grin on his face. She had seen the signs that he _did_ fancy 2D, but she debated whether or not she should tell.

She was about to say something else, but it came out as a yawn. It was very late and she was very tired.

"Geez, the sun will be coming out soon. I think that means we should get some sleep, eh luv?" 2D said as he stood up and gave a stretch and a yawn. Noodle just nodded.

She looked down at her watch. It was just past 4am. It had been like that almost every night, even when they had to do recordings or interviews the following day.

2D waited for her by the doorway as she slowly got used to standing again and began making her way to the door. She glanced up to the sky one last time. As she gazed up at one of the thousands of tiny lights in the dark sky she was certain she just saw one flicker out.

A star had died.

* * *

To be continued...


	2. Chapter 2: Alcohol

**Chapter 2: Alcohol**

**

* * *

**

Instead of sleeping like he was supposed to, 2D spent the rest of the night drinking. He'd just been about to enter his room in the basement when he felt a malevolent presence behind him. Murdoc invited him in for a drink, and, despite his better judgement, he accepted.

Memories from the night were cloudy and vague. 2D sort of remembered crawling onto Murdoc's lap (A visual accompaniment to a discussion about gentleman's clubs), and he sort of remembered telling the bassist that he fancied him. Everything other than that was a blur.

He'd woken up in his room, tucked under his covers, and he didn't remember how he got there. His head throbbed though. Headache or hangover, he couldn't tell. He would worry about the events of the previous night later, when it didn't hurt to do so.

2D entered the kitchen and was quick to raid the refrigerator. His head hurt too much to think, but his stomach was shouting at him to be fed.

"For God's sake, man, put some pants on!" he heard a low voice say. He looked down and realized that he was only clad in his briefs, which were nearly falling off.

"Oh! Sorry Russel. I guess I forgot," 2D admitted sheepishly. 'Good job, Dullard' he thought to himself, using the insulting name that Murdoc most often used on him.

"How much did you drink last night, 'D?" Russel asked as she grabbed 2D by the shoulders and began walking him back to his room for some pants.

"I…don't remember. How do you know I was drinking?" 2D was suddenly nervous. He prayed that Murdoc wasn't going off and telling stories.

"Your memory only gets bad enough to forget clothing when you've had a shitload to drink. I can smell it on you too. Now go put on some clothes." Russel shoved the singer into the room and closed the door.

2D rummaged around the floor for some clean pants. He finally found a pair and slipped them on.

Now that his head hurt slightly less, he was beginning to feel like a fool. He never was so careless when it came to drinking. Admittedly, he got drunk often, but not stupidly so. Not like this, where he couldn't remember what had happened. He was quite disgusted with himself.

For 2D, drinking was about finding a way to relax. He was always so high-strung, but when alcohol got into his system he was a little more peaceful, more open. And that had been the reason he accepted Murdoc's offer in the first place.

His plan was to drink enough for the nervousness to go away, and then he would make the biggest confession of his life. Sure, he had been dead tired, but it was the perfect opportunity. Oh, he confessed alright. But he couldn't remember what he said or what resulted from it. 2D needed to confront the bassist about this. _Now_.

"Hey, Russ?" he called, hoping that the drummer was still there.

"Yeah?" Came the reply.

"Where's Murdoc?" 2D was now searching for a clean shirt. Finding none, he decided going shirtless today wasn't a big deal. Not like had anywhere important to go to. (In public, anyway.)

"He's where he always is. Why?"

"It's nothing; I'm just wondering is all…"

"Whatever. Look, I'm going to my room to relax."

2D waited and listened to Russel leave.

He gathered as much confidence as he could and slowly made his way from his room to the door of the Winnebago. He gulped and took several deep breaths. His heart was pounding harder than his head now.

Knock.

There was no response.

Knock knock.

Finally, 2D heard some shuffling from behind the door. Loud grumbles and heavy footsteps. Murdoc must have been sleeping.

The door opened.

"What do you want, face-ache?" Murdoc frowned at him. His hair was still a mess (Contrary to popular belief, he did brush it every day) and his eyes were still heavy from sleep. His voice was also a bit more raspy than usual.

"Murdoc, um…" 2D tried to think of the words he wanted to say, but the pain in his head and his nervousness was making the task rather difficult. "I need to…talk to you about…uh…last night."

Murdoc said nothing but raised an eyebrow at him. 2D's stomach churned.

"Well?" The bassist said impatiently. 2D really didn't want to have this conversation out in the car park, but it looked like he had no choice.

"Look. Uh…I don't remember all of what happened last night but uh…" 2D's mouth was getting dry and he was fidgeting.

"So you wanna know what happened last night, eh?" Murdoc interrupted. 2D just nodded then shivered when his band-mate gave him a wicked grin. He opened the door wider for him, and the singer stepped in. He couldn't help but feel as though fate had taken a different fork in the road.

In certain societies, the only way to get people to tell you the truth is to get them drunk. Noodle had once explained to the singer that people in Japan are like that. They never tell you what they really mean unless you've given them plenty of alcohol. And 2D wondered; Could he really do this when he was sober?

They sat down in the same place that they had the night before. Memories were slowly starting to come back to the singer. Murdoc had been giving him those looks again. So 2D, in a drunken stupor, had started giving his band-mate the same looks.

"I'm sorry if I did anything that offended you last night," 2D choked out. Murdoc just grinned.

"If you'd done anything that offended me, brain-ache, you'd be in a lot more pain than just your hangover."

He had a point. The younger man felt himself relax a little more. He tried to speak again. "But still, I…"

He wasn't able to finish. Murdoc lunged forward and pressed his lips to the singer's in a bruising kiss. He could still taste the alcohol on the bassist's tongue, and for a moment he wondered about the other's level of sobriety. 2D's thoughts were once again caught short when he was roughly pulled to the floor.

"M-Murdoc, what are you d-doing?" the singer panted, his face flushed. Never in his wildest dreams did he imagine this happening, and yet it was... and he didn't know exactly how he felt about it.

"Just shut up and enjoy it, dullard," came the response. Murdoc had 2D pinned to the floor beneath him and was straddling the thin boy's hips, grinding slowly to make both of them more aroused. It was working.

2D couldn't help but wonder a moment. This all seemed so out of character for Murdoc, who was usually so rough. Why was he being so gentle? Suddenly a moan escaped from the singer's lips as he felt the older man's strong hand grab him roughly through his jeans, kneading his awakening arousal.

He began biting his lip. The war between his body and his brain had begun. Memories of that terrible childhood experience came flooding back into his mind. Memories of struggling, of how much he screamed in fear, and the moans of the boy above him invaded his mind's vision. 2D gave a scared yelp and harshly pushed Murdoc off. Both men were stunned at the move.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" Murdoc spat angrily. It was just starting to get good too.

"I don't know," 2D choked out. He backed up against the nearest object, a chair, and practically curled into himself.

It was half truth, and half a lie. He knew exactly what was wrong, but at the same time he didn't. He liked Murdoc a lot, and this had been the subject of several fantasies., but he was still terribly frightened at the thought of actually doing anything with a man when he was consciously aware of his own actions. He still barely remembered what they'd done the night before too, and that frightened him even more.

Murdoc was also biting his lip, but it was in an effort to try and keep his rage in check. He remembered the previous night clearly. He invited his dim-witted band mate in for a few drinks, because getting drunk was no fun alone.

Murdoc quickly realized he liked seeing the other man drunk, so he kept a close watch on how many drinks he was having for himself, and continued giving more and more to 2D. After a couple hours of drinking and, right in the middle of a particularly arousing conversation, the drunken singer had crawled on top of Murdoc and began smothering him with kisses. He told the bassist how much he thought about having Murdoc's cock shoved deep up his ass, and other such explicit fantasies.

Murdoc had to admit, it had made him really hot. He had slept with a handful of men in his life, although those encounters had been a thing of dominance or drunkenness. Generally, he didn't find men attractive in a sexual sense. Well, except for one. The cowering dimwit in front of him.

He couldn't explain why, but there had long been a small bit of desire towards the blue-haired man. However, just like 2D, these feelings had only surfaced recently, for reasons neither Satan or God would know. Murdoc was determined to make the younger man his. He wanted to own every part of that pale, bruised body. He _owned_ it.

"It's about that fucker who raped you, isn't it?" Murdoc finally said. 2D had told him about that experience the previous night too, while he was throwing up in the toilet and before he passed out on the floor.

2D wiped a few tears that were beginning to form and cursed to himself quietly for being acting like a baby. "I guess I must have told you about that, then…"

Murdoc's angry scowl turned into a vicious grin. "Aye. You told me a lot of things last night."

2D had mixed feeling of fear and further arousal upon glancing at his mate's face. He was still shaking with anxiety, curled into a ball, but thankfully not crying. His breathing was rapid, but was starting to return to a normal pace.

Slowly, Murdoc crawled towards 2D, once again pinning him. He leaned in and nipped a pale ear. "You have 30 seconds to get up and leave," he whispered. "After which I won't stop, no matter how much you whine and bitch. Even if it means breaking your soul into pieces."

2D thought very hard. He was so afraid, but he would by lying if he said he hadn't expected things to lead to this. The past was still frightening, the memories still hurt, but other parts of his anatomy were doing the rational thinking for him right now.

In that moment, he wanted Murdoc so badly he was willing to give his soul to the Devil if he had to. He decided he couldn't give up this chance. 2D's reply was a deep and hard kiss with arms wrapped around the other's body. Murdoc's lips pulled into a devilish grin. Now, the fun stuff could begin.

Almost in a flash, Murdoc had scooped up the thin boy and carried him hurriedly to his bed. 2D was practically thrown onto it, and he blinked as the older man took off his own shirt and tossed it carelessly to the floor.

Their lips met again, still hungry for more and more. Murdoc was desperate and was wasting no further time divesting both of them of their trousers and bothersome underwear. 2D was still shaking from nervousness, but his mind was now focusing on allowing himself to feel good.

They were both naked now, and flushed from arousal. They had seen each other naked many times, and under every circumstance under the sun. But this time was different. Both of their cocks were rock hard and screaming for attention.

With great hesitance, 2D was the one who made the first move. The younger boy wrapped his thin fingers around the pulsing organ of the older man. He began stroking, gently at first, then gradually squeezing harder and firmer.

"That's it, squeeze it hard. Mmm…yeah." Murdoc moaned in encouragement. 2D further surprised both of them by leaning down and flicking his tongue over the engorged tip, tasting the pre-cum there. Murdoc groaned loudly in approval.

2D, now gaining confidence, took the entire length in his mouth and sucked hard. Murdoc was roaring now in pleasure. He tried placing his hand on the back of the singer's head, but when the young man whimpered he quickly removed it. Better to let the boy go at his own pace, the older man concluded.

Murdoc suddenly, though reluctantly since he was about to cum, pushed his band-mate off his cock. The other boy wiped his mouth and looked up at him, confused.

"Your turn," Murdoc said, voice low and sultry. Had it been under normal circumstances he would continue on with his own pleasure, and after he reached his peak he would leave his 'lover' to fend for his or herself as he went off for a drink and a smoke. It couldn't work out that way between them, though.

The bassist pushed 2D flat on his back and forcefully spread his legs nice and wide. The pale young man tried to bring them together again, as if nerves and memories were flashing back, but the older man remained firm. 2D had his chance to get away, and it was long gone.

It was now Murdoc's turn to lean in and begin sucking the rock hard member of his 'lover'. 2D squirmed, but he was feeling extraordinary pleasure. It was much more intense than masturbation.

Murdoc continued his ministrations for several minutes. Then, without warning, pressed a saliva-slicked finger against 2D's tiny puckering entrance.

A cry of fear.

Murdoc hissed. "Don't worry, brain ache. Just relax or it'll hurt a hell of a lot more." 2D still whimpered.

Murdoc's mouth resumed its earlier work while his finger probed deeper and deeper. 2D was sobbing now. The finger in this ass didn't hurt. The memories did. But then, the bassist hit something in the singer that sent a wave of pleasure up his spine, and he moaned.

"Found it," Murdoc declared with a grin. He kept pressing that spot firmly, sending waves of pleasure to the younger boy. 2D couldn't stop squirming, and all thoughts came down to the feeling between his legs and how he wanted…

"More," he finally panted out. The older man was surprised, but he gladly gave in to the other's demands. He pushed a second finger in.

"Ah…yes…" 2D moaned. It started to hurt a little more now, but it felt a lot better than what he remembered. Gradually, he began rocking against the fingers inside him, and moaning louder and louder. It felt so good.

"Do you like this?" Murdoc asked, slowly bringing his fingers out and kissing 2D's thighs.

"Uh…yes…but why'd you stop?" 2D whined. Murdoc have another wicked grin.

The bassist got up and rummaged around the area and exclaimed an "Aha!" before returning to the bed. He tossed a box of condoms and a bottle of lube onto the bed. 2D sat up and looked down at the contents. He immediately knew Murdoc's intentions.

"Please…be gentle." 2D squeaked out. Murdoc just laughed.

"You've had enough of the gentle crap already. It's time you had a good rough fuck."

While Murdoc busied him with putting on the condom and slicking up his cock with lube, 2D just laid there quietly and did his own preparations. Mentally.

Murdoc flipped the singer over on his hands and knees, with his ass raised high into the air. He preferred this position because it made him feel dominant over his partner. He loved his dominance. 2D wasn't particularly fond of this position though.

"I was hoping to face you…"

"Yeah? …Well, too bad!"

And with that, Murdoc roughly shoved his cock into 2D's tight hole. The younger boy let out a scream of pain. Murdoc was so very thick, and he went into too fast. Long fingers clawed into the bed sheets, almost trying to pull the rest of the skinny body forward.

Murdoc wasted no time and began rocking in and out, setting a hard and fast-paced rhythm. He was groaning loudly. It had been too long since he fucked something as tight as this. He started going faster. The pain had faded away, and once again 2D was moaning loudly and pushing back to meet the other man's thrusts. He was using his fingers to anchor himself in place now.

Murdoc could feel his orgasm approaching. He reached under and started stroking 2D's cock in time with his thrusts. 2D couldn't last any longer. He came almost instantly from the dual pleasure and squirted onto the sheets below him. Murdoc came soon after, already so close to begin with, and he grabbed the singer's hips in a bruising grip as he rode out the last of his orgasmic twitches.

They both remained in the same position for several minutes before finally collapsing. Murdoc removed himself from 2D and tossed the soiled condom into the garbage bin. (aka, the floor. He would clean up later...)

The blue-haired man curled up onto his side and just closed his eyes. Not trying to sleep, but just trying to remain in the happy bliss he was currently in. He didn't want to face the consequences of reality just yet..

The bassist left briefly to wash the sweat off his face. He came back to find 2D gathering up what little clothing he'd shown up in. Murdoc raised an eyebrow.

"I…uh…I still have things I need to do this evening," 2D said quietly. In truth, the post orgasmic bliss was quickly fading.

"Whatever," came the emotionless reply. Murdoc was back to his usual self now. Neither of them acknowledged what had just happened. Not through words or gazes. They went on with their day as though it didn't happen at all.

That night, Noodle waited patiently on the rooftop for her friend. 2D was a little late, but he eventually joined her. She noticed that he hadn't brought his cigarettes with him this time.

Instead, he brought his alcohol.

* * *

To be continued...


	3. Chapter 3: Love

**Chapter 3: Love**

**

* * *

**

Noodle gave a long, relieving stretch as she sat up in bed and rubbed her eyes. She grumbled to herself in her native tongue at the fact that the sun was just barely starting to rise.

She and 2D hadn't stayed on the roof for very long. She was concerned, and eventually convinced him he should promptly go to bed. He looked like utter hell, after all. He seemed very distant in the hour or so that they were together. Something was wrong, but she didn't feel it was her right to just ask. They were close enough to share secrets at their own discretion, but dare not ask each other about them.

Putting those thoughts aside, Noodle dressed herself in a pair of white jeans and a pink top. That shirt was probably the only feminine piece of clothing that she owned. Even in skirts, even in other pink tops, she still pulled of looking like a tomboy. Grinning at the thought, she blamed it entirely on her fellow band mates.

She skipped her way downstairs, seeing Russel first and jumping on him.

"Good Morning!" she exclaimed while she clung to him in a tight hug. It was a morning greeting only reserved for Russel. Unlike the others, he didn't topple over when she did it.

"Morning, Noodle," Russel grinned, staggering back a little. She did this every morning, but somehow he was never prepared for it. "Hey, you know where 2D is? We need to start setting up to record today."

"No, I haven't seen him since last night," Noodle replied as her feet slipped back down to the floor. "Is he not in his room?"

"I looked in his room, in the kitchen, the café, the lobby, everywhere!" the large man explained, gesturing with his hands.

"Are you sure you looked _everywhere_?"

"Yeah, everywhere," he grumbled, but paused in thought for a second. "Well, except for Muds' Winnebago, but 2D would never be in there. Muds wouldn't even be awake yet."

Noodle had a sudden epiphany. 2D's distant mood from last night, his disappearance this morning… Based on the secrets that she knew now, she figured that something happened between him and Murdoc in the past 24 hours. She felt a sudden tightness in her stomach. Her heart felt ill.

"I'll go ask Murdoc anyway," Russel said and turned to leave.

Noodle put on a smile. "No, I'll go!" Russel raised an eyebrow at her, but just nodded.

"Sure. I'll meet you guys in the studio."

Russel wasn't blind, deaf, or stupid. He suspected that something was going on in the past couple of days. He had ran into 2D the previous night. The singer looked to be upset and in pain. 2D had been clutching his chest and crying like his whole family had just died. When Russel asked him what was wrong, 2D insisted that it was nothing and then just ran off.

The drummer just shrugged it off at the time, assuming the guy was just feeling stressed. Though he had to admit that he'd never seen 2D cry like that. The thoughts were put aside for now, though. He had other things to do. He gave a final smile to Noodle then left.

Noodle walked slowly to the door of the Winnebago, heart racing and body shivering slightly. She just blamed it on the coldness of the Carpark, even if she knew that wasn't really true.

All the signs pointed to rejection. Murdoc had probably gotten violent about it too. Noodle cursed in Japanese under her breath. She loved Murdoc as much as she loved 2D and Russel, but at times she also really hated him. She hated him because he hated everyone else. She hated him because, while being a despicable and un-likeable person most of the time, somehow people seemed to fall for him.

Why did he like that man anyway? Why would you love someone who is always making your life hell? Noodle just couldn't understand it one bit. Perhaps she was just too young to understand love and its complex workings?

Noodle stood in front of the door, just trying to listen if she could hear anyone inside. She could faintly hear the sound of someone talking.

She inhaled a deep breath and knocked on the door.

Some loud grumbling and unlocking sounds later, the door opened. Noodle was barely able to maintain a composed expression.

Clad in only his underwear, which were practically hanging off his hips, 2D had answered the door. He looked at her and smiled rather awkwardly. He had expected it to be Murdoc returning from a cigarette run. The older man never liked carrying around his keys (or just too frequently forgot to), so he told 2D to wait and guard the place until he got back.

Noodle was the first to speak. "We need to start setting up to do some recording," she said flatly.

"Ah, okay," 2D replied, not looking at her at all. "Uh...I have to wait until Murdoc gets back. He should be back soon."

It was a rather uncomfortable moment, to say the least. 2D expected Noodle to be staring at him in shock, but she was looking down at her feet. She just nodded as a reply, and then lifted her head to give him a big smile.

"Russel is already waiting. So be sure to hurry!" Another smile, then she darted off as fast as she could.

It seemed what really happened was the opposite of what she thought. She wasn't oblivious. She saw the empty condom packets all over the floor. And just the fact that 2D was almost naked and in Murdoc's Winnebago in the first place was a dead give away.

She didn't know what that new feeling inside her was. It felt painful, like there was something sharp trapped in her chest. She loved 2D like a brother, and all the time she tried to convince herself that the crush was just something insignificant. Why did it hurt her so much inside then?

A long day of recording passed by quick. 2D found himself unable to meet the eyes of anyone in the band that day. He figured no one really noticed, they were all busy. Or were they just pretending to be busy? He wouldn't meet their eyes, but when ever he looked at one of them, they seemed to be looking right at him. Staring.

When it was all done, the singer was thankful when he was finally able to retreat back into his bedroom for the evening. He was rather sore and tired, especially after the early morning activities he had engaged in.

After 2D was able to stop crying that morning, he went back to see Murdoc and spent several hours letting the man touch him all over. He'd decided to let himself become the older man's property. Deep down he wanted love from his new lover, but he knew he would never receive it. He would just have to settle for being a bed slave. It was better than nothing, he figured. He couldn't say that he didn't like the way it felt physically.

In her own room, Noodle hugged her pillow and wiped away her remaining tears. She was happy to hold out long enough to make it to her room to cry. It was embarrassing to cry in front of the others, but mostly she just wanted to hide any evidence that something may be wrong. She was the rock of the group. Hard as nails, as they say.

It wasn't so bad, really. 2D would be happy now and then she would be happy too, right? It's not like he was going someplace far away and she'd never see him again. He would be there, like always. Right?

Noodle waited until her puffy eyes subsided and grabbed a jacket before heading up to the roof. 2D would come and they would talk the night away, and she'd be happy. She would continue loving him in her own way. That would be enough.

But that night 2D never came. The sun was out in full before Noodle finally went back inside.

* * *

To be continued...


	4. Chapter 4: Change

**Chapter 4: Change**

**

* * *

**

On the outside, things appeared normal at Kong Studios. In the minds of the band members themselves, things had changed along with the season, with no chance to say goodbye to the way things were.

Noodle waited for 2D on the roof nearly every night. She knew that he wouldn't come, but was convinced that he would suddenly appear if she didn't go up there. Every night for a month a disappointment, but still she went.

She would also convince herself that the singer's lack of attendance was due to the amount of work they all had been doing. Long days led to short nights. Sleep was precious, and 2D seemed to need it more than anyone else (other than Murdoc, possibly).

That night, however, there was no denying why he wouldn't show. She'd seen the way Murdoc looked at him. She heard them whispering to each other, and saw the way 2D's face turned a bright crimson. Things had definitely changed.

2D was walked slowly through the dark hallways, wearing only underwear and a bathrobe, having just come from a shower. It was close to midnight and sleep refused to come, so he hoped a walk around Kong would make him tired. A small voice in his head kept telling him that he was forgetting something. The voice seemed familiar too. Suddenly, being lost in thought, he crashed into something. Or rather, a someone.

"So that's where you are, slave," Murdoc joked, uneven teeth bared in a grin.

2D just looked at him for several moments until it dawned on him who he was staring at. "What do you want?" he asked bitterly. Murdoc was the last person he wanted to be around right now.

"I'm horny and don't feel like paying for sex tonight," The older man explained, staring back at 2D like a piece of gourmet meat, and licking his lips.

"I'm not in the mood tonight." 2D tried walking away, but the sleeve on his robe was yanked and he nearly fumbled to the ground again. Arms wrapped around him from behind. 2D could feel a very hard lump pressing against his backside. Murdoc wasn't kidding!

"You ain't going nowhere."

"Lemme go, Murdoc!" 2D loudly whispered. They were in the hallway in front of Noodle and Russel's rooms and he didn't want to wake them.

"Never."

Murdoc pinned him roughly against the wall. 2D struggled hard, but he knew he was very weak compared to the older man behind him, especially when he was tired. Suddenly, his head was being pressed into the wall. It hurt too much, and 2D growled. Murdoc just chuckled, a low demonic laugh just under his breath.

"Please, stop!" 2D pleaded. He felt as his underwear ripped from his body and the robe pushed aside to expose his ass. No no, it has never been like this between them. He didn't want it like this. "Stop!"

Murdoc growled and mercilessly trusted into 2D. No warning, no preparation, nothing. All the younger man could feel was pain. "Shut up and take it, you whore."

He screamed and thrashed as the older man continued pounding hard into him. He kept whispering things into his ear like, 'You like that don't you, whore?', 'Take it, you bitch!' and other such vulgar sentences.

Trying to gain at least some form of pleasure from this encounter, 2D brought his hand up to stroke himself. Murdoc began to thrust harder and faster, aiming and hitting that spot in 2D that made a moan finally escape from his lips. The singer instantly pressed his teeth against his other hands to keep himself silent. A few more strokes and the younger man was finally able to cum, spilling his semen all over the wall and down to the floor.

Murdoc grabbed the singer's hair roughly and jerked his head back. 2D yelped quietly in pain. The bassist finally came too, pulling out with enough time for his cum to decorate the pale skin in front of him. Murdoc pulled back and allowed 2D to slump in defeat onto the floor.

"That wasn't so bad, eh dullard?" Murdoc wiped sweat from his face, taking a few seconds to catch his breath before pulling his pants back up.

2D just sat there facing the wall, looking rather pissed off. "Fuck off," he whined.

Murdoc rolled his eyes. "You've never been pissy about the way I've handled you before. I thought you enjoyed it?"

"I liked it more when there was something else besides you shoving your cock up my bum whenever you please." 2D was _really_ pissed.

Murdoc's face scrunched into a scowl. "If you're looking for cuddles and petting then you can just forget about it. I don't do that kind of shit. It's useless."

Though when 2D was asleep, he felt differently about all that. There was a night not too long ago where they fell asleep next to each other, and for once it was Murdoc who was awake first. He watched for a long time as the younger man's chest rose and fell as he slept. He gave into temptation and started running his fingers through blue hair. When 2D had nuzzled into the touch, Murdoc pulled away as though he'd been scalded.

After that night they no longer did anything else other than fuck during their encounters. No kisses or foreplay. A drastic change. 2D was not okay with this, but couldn't stop himself from allowing it to happen.

"Come on, time you went to bed," Murdoc ordered and helped pick up the broken boy from the floor. The singer couldn't help but take notice of the way the voice had softened. It was almost an apology, he supposed. That didn't make him less angry, though.

2D, too sore and too tired to refuse, let the bassist lead him down through Kong Studios, through the Carpark and into the Winnebago. All the way, 2D prayed and prayed that Noodle and Russel hadn't heard any of what had just took place outside of their doors. Although he would not realize until much later, his prayers were answered long before he'd asked for them.

Noodle sat quietly, staring up at the sky. She heard footsteps coming up behind her, but she knew they were not 2D's. They were slower and heavier.

"Noodle?" came a low voice. "There you are. I've been looking all over for you."

"Oh, Hi Russel," she said, trying to sound happy but failing miserably. "I'm always up here. You should know that by now."

"What's wrong?" he asked while he sat down next to her, shuddering at a cold wind.

"Nothing."

"Hey, come on now I'm not dumb. For the past month you haven't seemed like yourself. I'm worried."

Noodle said nothing. Russel sighed. He wasn't going to press her buttons, unlike the others. (2D was oblivious, and Murdoc liked to press him on purpose.) He tried a different approach.

He looked up the sky. It was rather cloudy, with only a few small clear patches where the stars could be seen. "So what're you doing all the way up here?"

"Waiting…for 2D" Noodle replied.

"….I don't think 2D's gonna come." Russel definitely was not dumb. He knew that 2D and Murdoc were doing. He didn't like it, but he knew better than to meddle in those kinds of affairs. It wasn't his problem. However, upon hearing the disappointment and sadness in the young guitarist's voice, it started to feel like his problem. No one was allowed to hurt her.

Noodle laid her head on her pulled up knees. "I know that. But it's okay, Russel. The sky is beautiful."

Russel leaned over and pulled her into his lap. He hugged her and said nothing as she cried softly. Noodle was grateful. She really needed someone to just be there right now. It made her feel a bit better.

Finally, Noodle spoke again. "I…I didn't want things to change like this. I hoped that 2D would still come up here with me at night, like we used to. But...now…"

"He's with Murdoc," Russel finished for her. Noodle wasn't unsurprised that he knew. Russel was very smart and observant, after all.

She soon fell asleep in his strong arms, and Russel took her back to her room. After that night Noodle stopped going up to the roof. She said it was too cold. Russel knew it was because she had reluctantly accepted the change.

* * *

To be continued...


	5. Chapter 5: Pain

**Chapter 5: Pain**

**

* * *

**

Murdoc wasn't the cold-hearted, emotionless monster that he appeared to be. He was human, and he felt sadness, despair, loneliness and pain. He chose to hide those feelings behind other words and actions, a code that no one in his life was able to decipher. When he couldn't hide them himself, he let sex, drugs, and alcohol do it for him.

He couldn't say his childhood wasn't painful, and that all of his issues were a direct result of it. He lost his virginity at a very young age. He was humiliated by his father, beaten by his brother, and ignored by everyone else. There had been a moment where he figured it was easier to pretend that it all never happened, despite being smart enough to know it would only explode at him someday.

And it was all fine, until he moved in with a singer, a drummer, and a guitarist. All of them asked him annoying questions like 'how are you?' at least once a week. Nosy bastards.

Murdoc was indeed depressed and in emotional pain, constantly existing in a black void with the demons that came from himself. He was far past the prime of his life and the only reason girls were still after him was because he was a celebrity. When you've spent your life living like everyday is some wild party, eventually you get tired of it. You begin to long for something, a reliable constant. A family.

The band _was_ his constant. Deep down he must have cared for all of them, even when they made him want to set Kong on fire with everyone inside. Russel was always on his case, but he was always there for him. Noodle the only female Murdoc spent time with that he didn't want to fuck. He loved how innocent she was. And 2D….

The singer was getting through to his heart, and the bassist was trying to keep him out. In the beginning he truly hated that man's guts, and only kept him around for the money. The hate dissolved into tolerance, and then to friendship, and now...it was definitely something more.

Murdoc hated the idea of romantic relationships, and 2D didn't change his opinion on that, but the he found himself wanting something more in the relationship he had with his band mate. He didn't enjoy cuddling and all of that shit, but he loved feeling close to the singer. He loved it when 2D clung to him while he was moaning his name.

What he'd done last night as wrong, and he knew it. He was a little bit drunk, had a little bit of another substance in him, but he couldn't blame those for his actions.

A soft, sleepy yawn suddenly came from his right, and Murdoc roused from his deep sleep. He growled at the light that assaulted his eyes. He waited for 2D to say something, but them remembered that neither of them had spoken to each other since their encounter in the hallway the night before.

2D still ached all over. Not just physically, but emotionally. He hoped that he'd feel better when he woke up, but he still felt the same. Sore and used. He sat up and turned his head to glance at Murdoc. He was awake too, and he realized they were both completely naked. Their eyes met for a second, but the singer turned away.

Murdoc finally spoke to break the silence. "You look downright awful, 2D," he commented. "Still tired?"

"Yeah." 2D yawned again. Murdoc leaned in and licked a long streak up the boy's arm. He shivered in fear.

"You should take the next few days off," the bassist stated.

"Huh?" 2D was confused. "Take days off from what?"

"From fucking." Murdoc tried to smile, but instead he just remain stone-faced. "I'm getting bored of it, and you don't like to play along with my games. I'll look you up when I get horny and can't find a bird to screw, alright?" Murdoc knew 2D wouldn't be able to crack his code, but he hoped the other man could sense what he was really trying to say.

2D's heart sank. Was there nothing between them beyond the obvious physical connection? "So that's it then? You try to rape me and I don't like it, so all of a sudden you don't want me anymore?"

"I didn't say that," Murdoc defended, and could barely stop the words that followed. "I just don't want to hurt you any-" He bit his tongue to silence himself.

"Whatever," came the singer's reply. He stood up and fumbled for the robe he'd been wearing the night before. He didn't see his boxers, but he didn't feel like staying to look.

Murdoc raised an eyebrow. "Where're you going?"

"Fuck you, you bloody tosser."

The bassist said nothing as he watched the other man exit the Winnebago. Well, he really fucked himself, didn't he? He looked down to the floor and saw 2D's boxers half hidden under pile of his own clothes. His own heart sank. "Really fucking messed it all up."

Morning had come and gone, and quickly the mid day was here and still the singer had done nothing. 2D had been sulking in his room all morning, and would have continued if he didn't have to take a piss. He finally left his room to use the washroom. While he was washing his hands, Russel came in.

"Hey there," 2D called, forcing his tone to sound cheerful. Russel glared at him. The singer blinked. "What? What did I do?"

"I am very disappointed in you, man," Russel shouted angrily.

"Huh?" 2D was still confused. Suddenly, he thought maybe Russel had heard them in the hallway last night. He swallowed a lump in his throat.

"I know what's going on, D. I know that you and Muds have been screwing around."

"Oh." 2D lowered his head. _Shit, he did hear us! Shit, shit!_

Russel glared even harder and was standing very close to 2D, getting in his face. "Now look, it's none of my business what goes on between you guys when the doors are closed, but, in case you didn't know, there's a certain girl that you've been neglecting."

2D gulped. "A girl?"

"For God's sakes, D, Russel groaned and rolled his eyes. "Noodle! You've been hurting her. She cares for you, man, and you've been ignoring her. I don't know what you did, but it's almost like you broke her heart!"

Noodle? Oh no. What did he do to make her sad? Suddenly 2D realized that in his obsession with the physical pleasure with Murdoc he'd completely forgotten about everything else. 2D brought a palm up to slam his face against. How could he have been so stupid?

"She kept waiting for you on the roof, you know," Russel continued "She waited for you while you screwed around with Murdoc down in the car park."

"I'm sorry," the singer said softly. He felt horrible. Sick, even.

"I'm not the one you should be sorry to. You better get this mess straightened out, or else I'll have to get involved." The drummer glared a warning at him, and then left the bathroom.

2D just stood there, staring at the ground. His heart was in so much pain. Russel knew about his 'relationship' with Murdoc, and Noodle probably did too. He really had been neglecting her, hadn't he?

Nightfall came and 2D hesitantly made his way up to the roof of Kong Studios. The stars were out, twinkling brightly, and the moon seemed brighter than usual. Noodle wasn't there.

2D looked all over for her, even finding the courage to knock on her door a few times. He gave up and the rumble of his stomach told him that he really should eat. He made his way to the kitchen. His great surprise, the young guitarist and standing at the sink washing a plate (She hadn't been there the first time he looked).

"Noodle," 2D greeted quietly. Noodle visibly stiffened, but then continued her task.

"2D," she greeted in return, but otherwise didn't acknowledge his presence.

He couldn't hold it on. He immediately began spilling his guts to her. "I'm so sorry if I've hurt you, luv. I…I guess I got too caught up in everything. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to do it. "

Her head turned and he could see her face. She smiled a little. The faucet was turned off and she wiped her hands dry, her back still turned. It was hard to look at him.

"No, I am the sorry one. I selfishly hoped that perhaps…you could…uh... Because I…" She bit her lip. It was just too hard to say out loud. It was wrong for her to even like him in the first place. Did he like her back? Even just a little? She was afraid of the answers to those questions.

She gasped when she felt his scrawny arms around her shoulders, pulling her back to his chest in a gentle embrace. The gesture made her body tense up, yet her tongue felt a bit loosened. "I have feelings for someone," she mumbled out. "I don't want you to stop caring for me."

"I'll always care about you, Noodle," he whispered. He pulled away and she finally turned around to face him. There was a blush on her cheeks, and she wasn't meeting his eyes.

"I don't like that you've been spending all this time with only Murdoc."

A light bulb turned on his brain. He thought back to those last conversations on the roof. She'd pressed him about his feelings with Murdoc. Why? Why did she want to know? Why did it matter to her? He replayed the words that she'd just spoken. _'I have feelings for someone.'_

"Oh. Oh!" He said out loud when he figured things out. "I think I understand, luv. The person you have 'feelings' for." Noodle raised her head to meet his eyes. He looked at her seriously and with concern.

"You shouldn't think of Murdoc that way, Noodle. He's nearly four times your age!" Not to mention, 2D could never allow her to be violated by such a terrible man.

Noodle's eyes widened and her mouth gaped open. It was the most perplexed and angry look that he'd ever seen on her. It took Noodle a few moments to voice her sudden rage.

"BAKA!" she choked out, roughly shoved him away as she stormed towards the door. Was he really that dense? How could he even get the idea that she liked that…that…disgusting man! That vile monster that was doing bad things to her poor 2D!

"Wha…ah…Noodle, wait!" 2D called out. He didn't understand why it was making her this upset. He ran as fast as his thin legs could take him. He caught up to her just before she was able to close the door to the kitchen. He held it open with his weak strength.

He looked at her. She was frowning at him, but her eyes looked as though she was ready to forgive him if he could say the right words.

"I'm sorry?" It was the best he could come up with.

The door was promptly slammed in his face.

* * *

To be continued...


	6. Chapter 6: Confessions

**Chapter 6: Confessions**

**

* * *

**

Noodle laid staring at the ceiling the bed in her room, her only haven from the world outside. She was very protective of it for that reason. She had nothing to hide, but it was the only place in the entire world where she truly safe. It was rare that she would let anyone in. No matter what was going on in her life, she could always retreat to her sanctuary..

Not this time.

She was still very cross with 2D, though by now (mid-morning, the next day) she had calmed down a bit. Her angry mind wandered towards Murdoc and what he was doing to 2D. Every day there was a new bruise on her dear friend. Suddenly, there was soft tapping at her door.

Noodle wiped her eyes with her shirt and took a few deep breaths to prevent her voice from choking should she need to speak. She opened the door to see a pouting 2D.

He said nothing at first. He just made puppy eyes at her. Noodle sighed and then gave him a sincere smile. She could never stay mad at Stu-Pot. And deep down, she knew, she couldn't stay mad at Murdoc either.

"Come in," she said. 2D was a little startled. He'd seen Noodle's room before, once when he HAD to sneak in and find something, but never once was he invited in. Even stranger, she led him by the hand to her bed, on which they sat on opposite ends. Noodle at the top, sitting with legs crosses facing 2D and hugging her pillow. 2D sat at the bottom with his long legs hung over the side, hands clasped together in his lap.

"I'm sorry, Noodle. I was very um…what was that word you used last night?" 2D stared off for a minute. He was so cute when he was dumb.

"Baka," she answered. "Stupid."

"Ah, yes that one. Well…I thought about what you were saying last night. It kind hit me about 4am, you see? I shot up in my bed all dramatic like. Anyway, I understand what you were trying to say, I think."

"I like _you_," Noodle blurted. It was so embarrassing to say that out loud, but she resisted the need to hide her face into the pillow.

The young man looked over at her and smiled. She was so adorable when she blushed, which was a rare sight to see since almost nothing embarrassed her. She did live with three men, after all.

"I meant what I said last night. I do love you, and I always will. You're my girl, my Noodle." He couldn't help but stare at Noodle and imagine what she would look like if she were older. Her body was developing, though it was something that you'd only notice if you were really looking for it. Noodle, the little girl who came to them in a crate, will grow into a woman that no man would be able to resist. The three boys would then invest in guns and sharp objects.

"I know." There was a long awkward pause before Noodle just had to ask him something. "2D, what do you see in Murdoc? Why are you this fake-relationship with him?" His eyes gazed right into hers. Noodle felt a little bit a shiver. Why was he looking at her like that?

"Well...it's...not really. We're not really involved with each other anymore. Er...kinda never was in the first place, you know? It's hard to explain."

"Then explain it to me."

2D choked back a low feeling in his throat. He leaned forward and brought her closer to him in a tight hug. Noodle blinked in confusion. She had no idea what was going on, but she was overwhelmed with a wave of joy. This, _this_, is the old 2D that she wanted back. She squirmed a little until her arms were free enough to hug him back.

They just sat there in each others arms, breathing against each other softly. Noodle blushed when 2D began rubbing her back. This was a kind of affection she'd never felt from him before, but it was nice and comforting. She dipped her face down into the crook of his neck to hide a silly smile that was spreading on her face.

"What's the matter, luv?" 2D grinned. He'd caught the sight of her blushing face and was amused by her efforts to hide it.

"No one's ever held me like this before," she squeaked out. "It's strange." Her breath on his neck made him shiver involuntarily. He loved that feeling. He hugged her tight again, then lifted her chin up to look him in the eye. He grinned wider, baring his mouth with missing teeth.

He leaned down and kissed her on the forehead. Once, then again. He moved down to place another kiss on her cheek. Noodle tensed up and the singer rubbed her back more to relax her. She couldn't believe this was happening! She moved to return the favour, return the comforting gesture, but without realizing it until afterwards she had went for his lips.

Both of them knew it happened, but they went on as if it hadn't. 2D kissed her one last time, placing it dangerously close to the corner of her mouth. Noodle pulled away, turning her head. 2D's palm touched her face softly, comfortingly. He really should say something about what had just happened between them, but he wasn't sure that she should.

Suddenly, a loud crash was heard down the hall, and a loud string of cursing came right after. The voice was unmistakably Murdoc's. They both sighed.

"I better go see what happened." He sat up and gave a stretch, exposing his not-so-taut tummy. Noodle giggled and gave it a poke. The singer pouted at her, then gave her a smile.

Still as innocent as ever. Maybe what had just occurred had nothing behind it. They were just friends, right? He ruffled her hair in retaliation then made his way to the door while she was still trying to fix it.

"Will you meet me on the rooftop tonight?" Noodle asked before he exited.

"You betcha, luv."

When the door closed, Noodle got up and danced around the room. She was just too happy. Things were starting to look better for the future.

"Oi, Murdoc. What's going on?" 2D eyed all the random bits of equipment all over the floor. Murdoc was grumbling while he was picking them up and tossing them back into the large box.

"Russel wanted me to get these from his room and bring them down into the recording studio. Says he wants to try and fix them or something. But they're damn heavy!"

2D raised an eyebrow at the casual tone of Murdoc's voice. He would be raving mad about something like this under most circumstances. "I'll help you," he declared, helping the bass player fill up the box. Murdoc just nodded. He wasn't even looking at him. Usually the bassist would be eyeing him over like fresh meat and trying to touch him all over. That's had had happened the last time.

"You alright, Murdoc?"

"What?"

"Something seems a bit off about you."

Murdoc made an angry looking pout. "Mind your own business," he snapped. 2D noticed that Murdoc looked greener than usual and his eyes were pretty red. He was probably either very drunk or very high.

"You look awful, Murdoc. Maybe you should go rest?"

"I said mind your own business, Stuart!" Murdoc snapped again and picked up the box. The bassist stumbled a moment then made his way to the elevator. He must have been very angry if he called the singer by his real name.

2D just watched him leave. Something must have happened the night before. Murdoc looked really trashed and that made him worry. On the other hand, he was still rightfully pissed off at that man. He didn't go after Murdoc. Instead, he dawdled around upstairs until finally going to his room to watch zombie flicks until he fell asleep.

Later that night. Noodle pranced through the dark halls on her way to find a sink, still feeling the joy of the morning. She made her way into the bathroom to wash her hands. Somehow she had gotten a messy substance on it when she pressed her hand against the elevator wall. It was red, but had no odour.

As Noodle was finishing her task, she could hear ragged breathing from the toilets. As if something was panting in pain. She slowly made her way over to see what it was. In the 3rd toilet stall, she saw Murdoc sitting there with his hands gripping his head, almost whimpering like a wounded animal.

"Murdoc?" her voice cooed softly.

He only gave a twitch in response.

"Murdoc," she said a bit more firmly.

"What?" he growled. Not even moving from his position.

"I heard you whimpering. Are you okay? Are you in pain?" Hesitantly, she moved closer and closer until she was almost in the stall with him. Now matter how angry she was at him, she cared for his well being.

"That little shit gave me some sort of experimental drugs. It's ripping me up from the inside out and giving me a fucking headache."

Noodle raised an eyebrow. "2D?" she asked. 2D was the only person she thought he would call such a name.

"Fuck no. Some girl who called me last night," he told her. "An ex-girlfriend of an old mate of mine. I wanted to have a good shag, but no one else was available. We did some kinky shit." Murdoc really had no idea why he was telling her any of this. Perhaps the drugs were rotting his brain even more than he thought.

Noodle placed her hands on his and pulled them away from his face. She then placed the back of her hand on his forehead. It felt very hot.

"Murdoc, you are very ill. You should see a doctor."

He stood up, nearly knocking her backwards. He shot a glare at her, grumbled, and then wobbly tried making an exit. He collapsed against the wall before he could reach the door.

"Fucking Christ," he muttered. His legs could no longer support him body and he slid down the wall. Noodle came and sat next to him. "I fucking hate that bitch. But I've got no one else."

Seeing him in such a state made all her anger disappear completely. Besides, she couldn't just leave him like that. She decided to keep him company until he could walk again. She would try and convince him to see a doctor while she was at it.

"I thought...you and 2D were..."

"He's only my sex slave," he explained (in his unbreakable code). His head was leaned back against the wall, his eyes were closed and he was breathing deeply.

"You're hurting him, you know," Noodle chided, brows furrowing. "Not just physically but mentally as well. You're breaking his soul."

"He came to me first," Murdoc tried to defend, but he knew he had no right from the very beginning to take what wasn't actually being offered. "He made the first moves. I'm only giving him what he wants."

"He wants more than just sex, Murdoc. He wants you to care about him."

"Christ, he should already know that I," he cut himself off with a wince. His head was really beginning to throb, more so than even his worst hangovers. He suddenly had more of an appreciation for what 2D went through with his migraines.

Noodle smiled, turning her head away so he couldn't see if he looked in her direction. It would be terrible inappropriate given the circumstances. So, Murdoc did care! Her head turned back to Murdoc when she heard him sigh.

"What the fuck do I do to at least give him a hint?" He almost shouted when he spoke. He kept telling himself it was the drugs talking, though he truthfully he was asking because he trusted her advice. In many ways, he trusted her even more than himself.

The guitarist lowered her head in thought. "Um...well...how do you have...uh...sex with 2D?" She blushed furiously at the thought of them having sex. Thankfully, Murdoc wasn't looking at her at all. His eyes were still closed.

"What do you mean, how do I do it? I shove my cock up his arse, fuck him a while, and we're done!"

"No no, I mean what sort of position? And why?" (Did she really just ask that?)

He couldn't help but laugh. He could hear the embarrassment in her voice. How cute! He lifted an arm weakly to pull her against him, just to make her even more embarrassed! He was such a naughty boy.

"I usually fuck him from behind. As for why? I don't know, I just like it that way. Makes me feel in charge, I suppose."

"I see. Well, maybe...you can let 2D be on top? Let him take some control. Physically and metaphorically."

He grinned. He didn't like sharing his dominance with anyone, but he was always in the mood to do something kinky and different from the usual. He got an idea. And oh, what a wicked idea it was.

"Thanks, luv. I'll keep at in mind." He opened his eyes and gave her a grin, one that she had never seen before, but appreciated. He coughed and coked for a few seconds, cursing about the pain in his head again.

"You should really go see a doctor," she insisted once more. He sighed and leaned his head back on the wall.

"Yes, I guess you're right. I can't get any nookie in this condition, can I? Help me up, darling." She helped pull him to his feet and he used her as a support.

"I'll get Russel to drive you," she said as they walked out of the bathroom and into the hallway. Somehow they seemed darker than before. Perhaps one of the lights had burnt out. As they walked slowly, Noodle was realizing that Murdoc wasn't so bad when you could see under the mask of anger and perversion. She was starting to see why 2D had fallen for him.

"If I'm lucky, maybe I'll get a sexy female doctor who will prescribe a good round of spanking," Murdoc said out of nowhere. He chuckled, even though it hurt. "I hope she has a nice ass!" Noodle giggled at his silly idea too. Murdoc was the one who needed a good spanking, in her opinion!

They were almost to the lobby when she felt his weight become heavier. "Murdoc, I can't walk for both of us," she scolded. The older man mumbled something under his breath. Suddenly, he became so heavy that she could no longer him up. They both toppled to the floor.

"I can't breath," he coughed out, clawing at his chest. "I can't breath!"

* * *

To be continued...


	7. Chapter 7: Death

**Chapter 7: Death **

* * *

**Author's Note**

Sorry for the unplanned hiatus in revising this story. I hope to get the last few chapters reposted while I'm in a position and the mood to work on them. D: I also want to thank everyone for the favs and reviews. You all are awesome!

* * *

_Thud thud...thud thud...thud...thud..._the familiar sound of a heartbeat was growing dimmer by the minute, fading away.

Murdoc had collapsed and he couldn't breath, couldn't think straight. It was as though everything was shutting down. Noodle screamed out the other band member's name, and 2D and Russel came scrambling down to the lobby. It was as close to the Carpark the guitarist and bassist had gotten.

"What's wrong?" 2D shouted, his voice ready to crack with worry and panic. He saw Murdoc on the floor clutching his chest with Noodle trying to comfort him and keep him connected to the world. The singer knelt down and tried to do the same.

"Murdoc, what's wrong with you?" he repeated. His hands fell upon the bassist's chest, and he was startled by the strong, erratic rhythm that he could _feel_.

Murdoc tried to speak, but he felt as though his throat was becoming tighter and tighter. He tried to stand up on his own, though he could only manage a wobbly rise to his knees, hoping the others would get the hint and get him to the damn hospital before he...

"D, go start the Geep," Russel said in a panicked growl as he picked up the bassist.

"Shouldn't we call an ambulance instead? I mean, they..."

"Dammit, D! It would take too damn long for them to get here and that's time we can't spare right now!"

2D gulped then nodded simply before he ran as fast as his long legs could take him to start up the vehicle. There was a tightness in his own chest now. He was afraid, scared and terrified. Afraid of what was happening to his lover, scared of what may happen to him, and terrified that there would be one less person in in his life tomorrow.

They raced through the streets, nearly getting in a few accidents but luck was on their side for once. Murdoc had been placed in the front passenger seat while Noodle and 2D were in the back.

As 2D stared at the ill form in front of him, he let his hand reach over and grab Murdoc's own, holding it firmly. He could feel the bassist squeeze it with what strength there was. He was obviously in pain, but was as he as scared as the rest of them were? Even Murdoc must afraid of death, right? The singer suddenly didn't care if the others were watching. He gave into impulse, leaned down as best he could over the seat in front of him and placed a soft kiss on the other man's lips.

"It'll be alright, Murdoc. You'll be fine," he comforted. Though in truth, he wasn't so sure.

After what seemed like a thousand eternities they finally reached the hospital. After the bassist was taken away by the nurses into a long hallway, they were told to sit in a waiting room by a doctor and that he would return periodically to give reports on their friend's health status. Reluctantly, they obeyed.

An hour passed and the doctor had not returned. The only updates they received was from nurses who would just tell them that the doctor is trying to do his best. Russel stood at the window. He silently mused about the fact that the night sky was too beautiful for a day like today. "In movies, it always rains at a moment like this," he pondered out loud.

Noodle sat in one of the chairs, holding her legs up to her chest and laying her head limply he knees. "Movies are not real life," she responded.

2D was just standing in the middle of the room staring at the ceiling like he was in a trance. A door opened and a man in a long white lab coat came in. The tension the room became so thick one could almost see it as a fog. The singer remained still but moved his eyes to the doctor. And then the man spoke.

"He's still doing pretty badly at the moment, I'm afraid. His heart stopped twice and the second time we almost lost him."

Noodle lifted her head to look at the doctor. She tried her best to keep her tears under check, but she soon found herself rubbing her eyes and keeping her head lowered so her band-mates couldn't see her tears. She felt a large hand on her shoulder. She leaned into Russel's side silently.

"I see..." 2D finally spoke, seemingly finally coming out of his trace-like state.

Then the doctor smiled. "But his condition is rapidly improving. What ever is in his system should subside by tomorrow, at this rate. It's quite a miracle, if you ask me."

2D was nearly toppled over by Noodle when she jumped on him with joy. He nearly had the wind taken out of him when Russel gave him a tight bear hug. 2D himself took a few moments for the information to register in his brain, but when it did a rush of joy spread through his veins.

"You mean...he's alright? He's not doing to die?" he choked out.

"With the way things are now, that is correct. Would you like to see him?" The doctor was barely able to finish his sentence and tell them the room number before he was shoved by three rushing bodies.

They entered slowly and silently when it appeared that Murdoc was sleeping. He was hooked up to a bunch of weird machines. 2D thought it looked like one of those cyborg movies. He couldn't help but grin at the idea.

"He's sleeping," Noodle said in a whisper. They all gathered around his bed and stared at down at him. He looked so calm and peaceful now. It was hard to imagine about the condition he had been in just an hour ago.

"Even in his sleep, he's still ugly," Russel said jokingly. They all laughed softly.

"Just because my eyes are closed doesn't mean I'm asleep and can't hear you. Idiot." The older man grumbled as he opened his eyes before making a motion to sit up. Noodle squealed and flopped into his chest.

"How are you feeling, Murdoc?" 2D said as he pulled up a chair to sit next to the bed. Murdoc was stroking Noodle's back, almost tenderly, until she pulled away and sat on 2D's knees.

"I'm alright. Still feel like shit though," he said with a sigh.

"What the hell happened?" Russel frowned. Murdoc told them the same story he had told Noodle, about the woman with the drugs. Russel just shook his head, commenting on how he should stop drugs altogether. 2D just pouted and at that moment wished he had the moral ability to hit girls. That one certainly deserved it.

They all just talked for about an hour about everything and yet nothing at all. They laughed together, which they all had missed. For the past several months tension was high at Kong Studios. Due to obvious events, they all had put up barriers between each other to prevent any major confrontations. There were still some things that they had to discuss together, but those things could wait for another day. Murdoc had been saved from death. They knew he had a lot to think about on his own.

"It's pretty late. We should be getting back and letting you rest," Russel said with a sigh.

Noodle had fallen asleep curled up to Murdoc's side. He could feel her soft breaths of the thin fabric of hospital robes the doctors had put him in, much to his disapproval. He absolutely hated the colour. He was thankful no one had said anything about them, otherwise he'd have to kill them all.

"Darling little thing she is, eh?" The bassist mused. Russel just smiled before gently picking her up him his arms.

2D opened his mouth to say something, but his he was too quiet for the others to hear at first.

"D, come on," Russel called from the doorway.

"I want to stay here," the singer said louder so he could be heard. It definitely wasn't a question. He'd already made up his mind. He was staying because he had to. He had to make sure that Murdoc would be alive tomorrow.

Russel glanced at Murdoc, who gave a twitch of a nod. He large man nodded back. "Alright, D. Me and Noodle will come back tomorrow. Take care."

They were alone now, for the first time since that...thing happened between them. They sat in silence for several minutes before either of them said a word.

"I'm really glad you're okay," 2D spoke. He was sitting in the chair next to bed still, but he was facing the far wall, parallel to where Murdoc was staring to.

"I swear, if I ever see that bitch again," Murdoc growled, but didn't much have the strength to be pissed off. He was too tired. Nearly dying several times in one night can do that to you.

"Murdoc?"

"Yeah?"

2D hesitated before crawling onto the small bed and curling up against him, just like Noodle had done. Just like with Noodle too, Murdoc raised a hand and stroked his back.

"2D, I'm going to say something that I'm only going to say once and never again." Murdoc closed his eyes in thought, trying to gather the words in his head. 2D lifted his head to look at Murdoc's face.

"This whole experience has made me realize something. You guys are my family and..."

"And?"

"It would be awful to lose you lot."

2D grinned. He knew exactly what Murdoc had wanted to say, though he knew he could never say it out loud. Even at a moment like this.

The singer snuggled into the older man's chest. "We love you too, Murdoc."

The bassist grinned. "Yeah, yeah. No need to get all emotional about it. Now get your face up here and kiss me." 2D happily complied.

The kiss was unlike any other they had previously shared. It was slow and almost loving, not the desperate lust-filled ones that 2D was used to, but yet they seemed just as forceful. Eventually, they had to pull away for air.

As they pulled apart, Murdoc roughly grabbed 2D's hips, which had moved to straddle the man's stomach as some point during the kiss, and pushed him down roughly on his crotch, which 2D found to be amazingly rock hard already.

"You know what I wasn't, don't you?" He grinned slyly. Suddenly he wasn't tired anymore.

"Murdoc, we can't!" he protested, though he loved the feeling and began unconsciously rocking his hips for friction.

"Why not?" Murdoc panted.

"Someone might come in and see!"

"So?"

"You shouldn't do this in your condition!"

"Pants. Off. NOW!" Murdoc growled. 2D gave an overdramatic sigh of defeat. He sat up and began taking off his own pants, which was a rather awkward task in the position he was in.

"Um...how are we gonna do this? With all those things hooked up to you, I don't think you can get up behind me." Murdoc rolled his eyes.

"We're not doing it that way, dullard. You're gonna ride me."

"What?" The singer's eyes opened wide. He blinked for a few moments and Murdoc rolled his eyes again before pointing to a small cupboard across the room.

"There are some lotions and lubrications in there. Go grab one," he ordered. 2D nodded and searched through said cupboard, coming back with one of the bottles. He squeezed a little into his hand, lifted Murdoc's hospital robes up to his waist and stroked him gently, covering the bassist's hard member with the cool lotion.

"Get on," Murdoc ordered again, but he let the singer prepare himself for few minutes first. 2D once again straddled the older man's hips and began pushing down. He squeezed his eyes shut and winced at the pain.

"Fuck yes..." Murdoc groaned, pushing the young man's hips down harder with his hands. He was taking is slow for the other's sake, though still was trying to get things going as fast as possible. He didn't want to wait.

2D's heart throbbed. One, because they were about to screw in a hospital room, and two, because this was a completely different position. Murdoc never wanted a different position. The fact that he was facing his lover made his heart throb even more. The bassist could easily have told him to face the other way, but he didn't. He let 2D face him. That in itself was a thing to celebrate.

He was finally in and just waiting to get used to the feeling. 2D was panting, yes closed in concentration, so he was startled when he felt a hand caress his cheek for a brief second. That was causes the last of his fragile mental control to break. Dear He felt like he would pass out any minute from the new pleasurable sensations. Everything felt a little different. He loved it so very much.

"Harder, Luv," Murdoc pulled his lover down to nibble his earlobe a little and to whisper into it. "Make me feel alive."

The younger man moaned and his hips began moving harder and faster. He worried slightly about the bed being able to hold out, but the thought quickly passed when Murdoc began kissing him.

"Murdoc, I don't think I'm going to last at all," 2D panted. Everything was just too overwhelming. Murdoc nodded in agreement and began thrusting his own hips upwards as best he could.

In a delicious, hot flash the singer came hard, biting his lip to keep from screaming too loud, his seed splashing onto the hospital robe and on the bassist's stomach and abdomen. Murdoc came a few moments later with a loud grunt.

As always they remained unmoving for several minutes before 2D had enough energy to pull away. He flopped next to his lover on the tiny bed and bathed in the afterglow of this special experience.

"Will...this be a one time thing?" 2D spoke softly, nearly purring as Murdoc's hand began stroking his back again.

"What, sex in a hospital bed?" Murdoc teased.

"No, I mean...getting to face you."

"We'll see," he offered. In his mind he had a wicked smile. He had much more planned after this.

Using the parts of the sheets that hung over the edges of the bed, 2D helped clean off the both of them and trying to make everything appear that they had not soiled the hospital property with bodily fluids. Once that was finished, the younger man settled himself in the chair to sleep. "Murdoc?" he said just before he could drift into dreamland.

"What now?" the bassist grunted. Now he as definitely too tired to be pissed.

"Pink is a nice colour on you," he said, referring to the hospital robes.

* * *

To be continued...


End file.
